SIX MORE DAYS TO GRADUATION!

Well, it's six more days to graduation! Andrea took her last final yesterday! Her final final! well at least in high school.

I picked up her grad announcements on Monday, and I was a just a little sentimental as I was writing them out. Where did the time go? It seems like only a few years ago that we moved back to Cleveland. Shawnya had just graduated, and Shaun was in the second, going to the third; Andrea the first going to the second. Now less than a week from now, my youngest will be walking across the stage to receive her diploma! WOW!

What am I going to do with myself? HA! I have quite a few things in mind. Can you say CELEBRATE! LOL! I emailed my friends announcing the countdown on yesterday:

"SEVEN DAYS TO GRADUATION! THAT'S IT AND THAT'S ALL OR THAT'S ALL AND THAT'S IT. IT'S KICKIN' IT TIME, WITH A CAPITAL "K" HEY, HO! HEY! HO! HAH, HAH! DUN, DUN, DUN, DUNT....."

I'm having a Graduation Party... or should I call it an Empty Nest Party... ALL SUMMER LONG! everyone is invited! LOL!"

I do plan on celebrating all summer long, as I prepare to send her off to college. She will be attending Miami University in Oxford, Ohio. The girl really thought that she was going far, away! While we lived in Michigan and even once we moved back here, all she talked about was the University of Michigan. I was OK with that, just right up the road, and I know people there that she can contact in case of an emergency.

Then a few years ago that changed. Why? I don't know. She talked about the University of Southern California! Now mind you I don't know anyone out there, not family anyway. Second, how would we get her college things out there? Hell, I know I'm not driving that far! Third, How would she even get back and forth? Plane? Train? Car? If plane, who has the money to fly her back and forth? How would we get there if something came up suddenly? She didn't care... I brought all of this up to her and she still thought she was going there. She also looked into a fashion design institute out there. Mind you that place didn't even have a campus and she would have to live in some apartments they have or something. HUH? What part of "we don't have the money to send you that far, and we don't have any family or close friends to help look out for you did she not understand?" Anyway she had been in contact with an admissions rep for the fashion school, and was in the process of applying!

She did apply for USC, but didn't finish the process, so that was that... I even told her to apply so she wouldn't spend the rest of my life saying that I kept her from applying...

She then applied at quite a few schools, most of them far away... Fordham in New York; Clark Atlanta - I'm still trying to figure out why she applied there because she was set against going to a HBC, and one day she came in and said I'm applying to Clark Atlanta! Go figure!

The last four she applied to because of the free application were: University of Northern Arizona, St. Johns in Queens, NY, Xavier in Cincinnati and Northwood in W. Palm Beach Florida. I added University of Dayton and Miami University because of all the colleges that were sending stuff, I have an entire crate of college materials, those two were the only ones that mentioned money up front, for her ACT/SAT scores, and for being an Ohio student.

She got accepted to all except Fordham. And she had her heart set on Northwood, in W. Palm Beach. Out of all of them the best financial packages were from the Ohio schools. No doubt because we know that state schools have the lowest tuition. Even explaining this she still wanted to go to Northwood. I don't think she had ever heard about the school until she found the free application online! We do have family in W. Palm Beach, so if I decided to send her there, she would have someone to contact or keep in touch with, family. But again, what about the cost? How would she get back and forth? How would we get her things back and forth? and as I said before I sure ain't driving down there!

We later found out that Northwood is an automotive business school, originated in Detroit by Ford or GM, for students that were interested in the automotive business. They had maybe two more campuses, with one in Florida. Now why would she even want to attend a school like that? I imagined it being like a U of Phoenix or something, not a really big campus, but a satellite school...but she didn't care.. Actually all she was trying to do is get away to somewhere sunny, not even thinking about how she was going to get back and forth and who has the money to pay for it! I don't have any money, and her dad sure don't.... and of course the little money that I may have started saving is long gone, due to being off of work at times over the years. Let me add this piece of advice, and it's free... Start trying to save money for college when the kid is born, because that time goes by so fast and then you will find that you haven't even saved for college. I know things come up and that money sitting there can help you out, but start early so if you need to borrow from the college fund, hopefully it won't be depleted by the time the kid go to school. Now I'm off of work, and her dad is on disability so none of us have money that we can go to to send her to school. I had to rely on financial aid, and thank God we have that to rely on.

She still is not happy about going to Miami U. Still pokes out her nose and says that it's in the middle of no where. although Cincinnati is just 45 minutes away. We confirmed her acceptance on May 1st in the evening. Did I tell you that the deadline for confirmation was May 1st! The last minute! She was holding out that I would be OK with Northwood! HA! I gave her 3 choices out of all those that she were accepted to. University of Dayton, Xavier, and Miami U. All of the state schools were better choices financially, with Miami first, U of Dayton second, and Xavier 3rd. All were doable financially, so of the 3 she reluctantly, hesitantly, chose Miami.

I forgot to mention that we attended a Miami U accepted student reception in April and she was kicking and fighting, saying she's going to Northwood. Actually that's how we found out is was an automotive business school, from one of the reps there. She also met two freshman from our area that attended, and both of them said that that was not their first choice. The young lady from Shaw said that she only went there because of the financial aid package they offered. Now both of them really like Miami and was singing its praises. I hope Andrea will feel that way next year this time. We'll see.

I don't know about our kids these days. I think many of them are spoiled because we were able to give them things that we didn't have growing up. I know I can say this about my situation. I came up without what we will call the basic necessities, and of course being in a better situation financially my kids were born with stuff. Examples: A nice house, car, computer, phone, color TV/TVs. cable, washer and dryer, lots of food, clothing, toys, etc. A lot of you may say well those things are the basic necessities, but coming up I didn't have many of them. Mom was trying to raise 6 of us alone, and we didn't have the washer and dryer at home; we didn't have a phone, computers were not available then; we walked everywhere, didn't have a car; we didn't have a lot of food, especially junk food around; we didn't have a TV in every room, maybe 1 and that was black and white; of course cable wasn't out then, so we had a few channels 3, 5, 8, 43 and 61. We didn't have video games, they were not out then, but I think Atari came out when we were teens, but we didn't have it; I can go on and you get the picture.

So our kids come up thinking that the stuff that they were born into is basic, and everyone has them, and since they got stuff, we got money... they can go and eat anything that is in the refrigerator, kitchen, etc. We didn't have any options, what was fixed that night for dinner, that was it! No sandwiches, dinners, etc.. what was on your plate you ate, or you went to bed hungry! We didn't get to eat fast food more than once a month, it was a luxury for us to have fast food, when Mom got her check. but my kids got Wendys or McDonalds maybe 1 a week, when they got older of course.

Side bar: Why do toddlers know about Wendys, McDonald's happy meals, etc? That's why doctors are talking about testing toddlers for cholesterol as a part of their physical exams! that's why kids are overweight and fighting diseases that years ago only were found in adults! High blood pressure, high cholesterol; diabetes,etc... kids are eating too much fast foods, high sodium content foods, fried foods (can you say french fries, chicken nuggets, Happy Meals?)

and I really believe that most of these kids with ADD/AHDD really don't need medicine, they need a diet free of sugar.. I've seen toddlers with rotten teeth, having to have caps, teeth pulled etc. What the! stop giving them candy, cookies, pop, etc. my kids were still getting a half of can of pop when they were really old, like 10/12! my oldest and youngest never had a cavity! Shaun, that's a different story, but it's not because he ate a lot of candy and sweets!
Johnny don't need Ritalin, he probably needs 1 or 2 things: an old fashioned butt beating or the sweets and fast food cut out of his diet. I bet Johnny would settle down then!

OK, back to spoiled kids: they just had stuff when they were born and coming up. their own rooms, they didn't have to share with 2 more sisters or brothers. not to mention their own TVs, cell phones, computers, etc. they wore nice cloths, not necessarily the most expensive ones, but nice ones.. they didn't have to wear their tennis shoes as their only shoes. they had boots, church shoes, tennis shoes and maybe a pair of school shoes.. I remember having to wear the same shoes all winter long, and they were not boots, and no I didn't have another pair to wear. we walked to school or was lucky enough to get a ride with a friend's brother, sometimes...

Yes, we give our kids more than we had coming up because we can afford to. But is this making them spoiled, unappreciative, entitled, lazy? I think so... I believe that if they came up like we did, and had to work for all of their stuff, then they would appreciate it more. They need to experience how to manage without electricity or gas. They need to learn how it is to walk to the laundry mat or to wash cloths in the bath tub. They need to learn how to live without a TV; share a room with their siblings; eat only what's fixed for dinner; no options; no cell phones; no phones; no computers; a few changes of cloths; 1 pair of shoes; OK, that's enough... for now...

I write all this to say that is why I think Andrea thinks that she can go across the country to school. she thinks we have money because she was born into some stuff... she didn't have to go without the basic necessities that I came up without, and she has a lot of things that I didn't have until I was grown with my own money! The Girl needs a reality check! LOL!

well until my next post...